Week #12 – There is no (i) in “Thoughtful” either! (aka 14 Ways to Spread Happyness this Holiday Season)

#50 (Photo credit: Grace Church)

#50 (Photo credit: Grace Church)

(Editor’s note: Thanks to all who’ve generously responded with donations or pledges for the 50 for #50 virtual toy drive!  We have 8 individuals confirmed so far, with a total of at least 15 gifts given in Rob’s honor to-date, and there are at least a dozen more promised.  Check the footer of this page for an up-to-date list of toys and locations — and if you’d like to join the tribe, just let us know what you donated and where…and maybe even post a photo!  I’ll update the total each week, with a grand total at the end of the month.  THANK YOU TEAM HAPPYNESS!!!)

Week #12 – There is no (i) in “Thoughtful” either!  (aka 14 Ways to Spread Happyness this Holiday Season!)

In the lower right hand corner of the word board, there is an anonymous note: “Thoughtful and Warm.”  The word “thoughtful” jumped out at me.  What does it mean to be thoughtful — and how is that a recipe for happiness?

Last week I wrote that it take (U) to be “Generous”.  Well…it takes (U) to be “Thoughtful” too.  In fact, it takes TWO of (U)!  Because the only way to be thought-ful — is to be full-of-thought for someone else!

But let’s face it — the holidays can be a hurried and stressful time of year, with little time to think at all!  Forced togetherness, unmet expectations, year-end work demands, more commitments to others, less time for ourselves, not to mention sadness related to those who are missing from our celebrations.  And now I’m asking you to think of others!

But perhaps now — when we feel we can least afford it — is the PERFECT time to stop and think about what it means to be “thoughtful”!  I found 14 synonyms that shed some light — and they may be things you are doing already!  Above all…the one common denominator in all these things is that there is someone else involved.  Thoughtfulness indeed takes TWO of (U)!

  • Astute – smart, quick, perceptive
  • Attentive – giving attention; observant
  • Careful – cautious, exact, thorough
  • Considerate – awareness or regard for another’s feelings
  • Courteous – mannerly, polite
  • Deliberate – carefully considered, intentional
  • Discreet – judicious; prudent
  • Friendly – showing personal affection or regard
  • Gracious – kind, benevolent, courteous
  • Helpful – giving aid or assistance; of service
  • Polite – well mannered
  • Prudent – wise or judicious
  • Tactful – appropriate, tasteful

Your assignment for this weekend: Did Rob touch your life in one of the 14 ways listed above — or is one of these a particular gift all your own?  If so, pay it forward this weekend to someone else who needs it (or maybe even to yourself…sometimes the wisest counsel comes from within!).  Otherwise — pick the one word that jumps out at you the most.  Make that your mission for the week ahead.  Try it on for size.  See if it improves your relationships or lightens your burdens — but above all, see if it SPREADS HAPPYNESS to those around (including you, too)!

Will you make time to be THOUGHTFUL about THOUGHTFULNESS this weekend?!

Spread Happyness — and share your thoughts in the comments!

12/5/14 by Grace Church
© Grace Church

UPDATE 12/5/14: Saturday’s Monster Truck Rides for Toys event has been canceled due to weather — and Sunday’s event has been moved to Hackettstown!  Amy Wood-Oblen (classmate of Rob’s) is holding a Monster Truck Rides for Toys event to benefit local families on Sunday, December 7th — now at Highview Farms — 416 Sand Shore Road on the border of Hackettstown/Budd Lake next to Sand Shore School.  Free monster truck rides to anyone who donates an unwrapped new toy at these events!  Check Amy Wood-Oblen’s FB page for details!

AS OF 12/23/14:
1. Thomas the Tank Activity Toy was donated at Dollar General in Netcong, NJ.
2. Two Lego sets and a Lincoln Log set were donated at Toys for Tots in Stockholm, NJ.
3. Two Operation Christmas Child boxes, Baby Chicks, a Bible, and money to fund Thanksgiving baskets were donated at various locations near Succasunna, NJ.
4. Two Hallmark Jingle Bell Stuffed Animals will be donated in Flanders, NJ.
5. CLUE game will be donated in Flanders, NJ.
6. Hot Wheels Assortment was donated near Stanhope, NJ.
7. Donation made to EFA (Endometriosis Foundation of America) in Robert’s memory.
8. Barbie VW beetle donated to Community Hope’s SSVF Program (supportive services for veteran families)
9. A baby doll with a pacifier and crib, a doc mc stuffin gift pack, and home made loom bracelets were donated to the Hackettstown Police Department in Hackettstown, NJ.
10. 2 stuffed horses, a Crayola creation set and a remote control car were donated to Toys for Tots in Parsippany, NJ.
11. Four wigs (along with bandanas) were donated to Carol G. Simon Cancer Center in Summit, NJ.
12. Five gifts — Mega Blocks, a play xylophone, a Fisher Price Rock-a-Stack, a baby doll, and a plush puppy dog — were donated for a sweet little girl through Angel Tree in Tampa, FL.
13. A monetary donation was made to Toys for Tots near Flanders, NJ.
14. A donation was made to Mylestone Horse Rescue in Rob’s name.
15. Two very generous donations were made in Hopatcong, NJ: Gift #1 — 2 sweaters, 2 mulitmedia pads, a color wheel, and 126 mulitmedia art set. Gift #2 — tie dye kit, package of white tee shirts, cross stitch kit, crewel kit, soap making kit, nail kit, 2 bottles of nail polish, nail treatment, nail oil, base coat and top coat, and lots of socks!
16. A donation was made in Rob’s memory to Memorial Sloan Kettering.
17. Donations were made at Toys for Tots and Bergen County animal shelter in New Jersey.
18. A donation was made in Rob’s name to Eleventh Hour Animal Rescue.
19. A $50 donation was made in Rob’s name to United Methodist Global Aviation Ministry.


8 thoughts on “Week #12 – There is no (i) in “Thoughtful” either! (aka 14 Ways to Spread Happyness this Holiday Season)

  1. Cousin Mary


    You just have a great way of putting things and so well said that it does not take money to be thoughtful, for it can be a text, phone call or e- mail etc just to let someone know your thinking of them and how important they are in your life. Wishing you a great weekend


    1. Grace Church Post author

      Thanks, Mary! Always great to hear from you. And yes — all 14 ways to be “Thoughtful” are absolutely free! (And PS: Happy Birthday!)

  2. Marlo

    First of all love this weeks photo, how adorable! Today marks the 3 month anniversary of losing our special guy. Today Madeline, Tony, and I donated to the Hackettstown police dept a baby doll with a pacifier and crib, a doc mc stuffin gift pack, home made loom braceletes and a set of matchbox cars from my mom and step dad. Its a sad day but we all feel better after making those donations on this day. I am sure we cann get to our goal of 50…..thanks everyone else who have donated…xoxo
    Miss you Robert Church Jr….you are on my mind all the time…..

    1. Grace Church Post author

      Thanks for the post — and the donation details! Yes — three months today. How can it be?!

      I’ll add everything to the list, which makes you #9! Who wants to be #10?!

  3. anne wright

    Attentive and friendly jumped out at me when I think of Rob and, may I write those words describe Chris. She died almost to the day a year earlier than Rob.

    There is an expression that goes something like this:
    People may not remember what you did, what you said but, they will remember how you made them feel. Rob and Chris made me feel treasured, happy, loved and safe. Thank you.

    1. Grace Church Post author

      “People may not remember what you did or what you said…but they will remember how you made them feel.” Great food for thought, Anne! Thank you for sharing that!

    2. Gina Buongiorno

      That’s is so true Anne, and that’s just one reason everyone loves the Church family. You always feel welcomed and loved around them. They are also a heck of a good time, too. 🙂 And Anne you do this too! Whether its a conversation or a facebook post, you always make me smile and feel good.


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