Week #346 – Mother’s Day is May 9th! (Here are a dozen ideas that DON’T involve reservations!)

Greetings Tribe — and Happy Friday!

This is my yearly PSA to remind those of you who are celebrating Mother’s Day this year:

PLAN AHEAD!

And this year again, it may be different! (Very different!)

Because this year, once again, you may not be able to just pick up the phone to make any old reservation. So I’m reminding you NOW to take a moment to think about what the ladies in your life REALLY want.

And I’m not talking about jewelry or clothes, purses, or perfume either — since money may still be tight, demand is high, and shipping times may be long.

When I polled over 50 ladies in the week prior to my original post, I asked them:

What do you REALLY want but are afraid to ask for?

The answers may or may not be surprising — but one thing is for sure: very few of them can be purchased at the mall or served in a restaurant.

(Which is a good thing…because those may not be great options again this year.)

Mother’s Day remains one of the most stressful days on the restaurant calendar in a normal year…and this year might be even more stressful due to staffing shortages and remaining protocols.  It is never a good day to make last minute plans or assume your favorite restaurant can accommodate your party of 14 for brunch.  

If the lady in your life LOVES to dine out, check in with them early to see what they are offering — and be sure to ask about special to-go menu options that could help you celebrate with a larger party outside or at home, or a gift certificate for a future date or night out.

If not, take heart — and listen to what REAL MOMS told me they REALLY want on Mother’s Day:

For Starters
– Extra Sleep: this may mean sleeping in, a nap during the day, or an undisputed and early lights-out.  Most of all — moms want sleep! (Especially moms who’ve been busy homeschooling their kids this year!)
– Time Alone: moms have a difficult time asking for this because they love their families — but next to extra sleep, all moms expressed some desire for time alone to read, watch TV, swing in a hammock, putter in the garden, work on a project, or just finish their morning cup of coffee.  From just a few extra minutes of solitude to 48 hours away from home — moms want a little time that’s all their own! (A super nice bonus for moms who’ve been on top of their families and unable to get away since mid-March of 2020.)
– Peace & Quiet: over and over again, moms longed for a day of no fighting, fussing, stress, or strife.  This is a good day for kids to practice their best behavior — dads too! (Especially after a fully year of all that togetherness!)

The Main Course
– Spa Service/Pampering: This may be a big one this year! Meals are big part of any occasion — but most moms I first polled wanted some sort of pampering.  This year, a massage, manicure, pedicure, facial, or full service may be a much-needed and well-earned gift. By now many services are fully open…and it will be a welcome spa-day when it happens!  (Just be sure to find out her favorite places — or get a recommendation from a friend!)
– Special Dinner at Home: The year I took this poll, most moms said they’d prefer to eat a meal at home — they just don’t want to be responsible for planning, preparing, and cleaning up after it!  If you decide to treat mom to a home-cooked feast — just be sure you are prepared to take care of everything right down to taking out the trash (and if you order out, order early)!  Cleaning up someone else’s mess is not a gift!  
– Time with Family: I know, I know — moms said they wanted time alone, right?  Well, they also want time with their families.  Just gathering everyone under one roof, for one day, could make your mom’s year — especially this year when so many families have kept their distance out of love and caution!
– Gardening & Yard Supplies/Help: Several moms mentioned gardening and yard supplies, and a little help getting things done!  One of the most entertaining accounts was of a family that gathered to weed and plant while the mom sat in a chair and gave instructions!
– Stuff: A hammock, flowers, something pretty, something tasty, a movie night, or a scuba diving excursion later in the year when travel is back to normal — there is still a desire for presents, but not always the ones you’d expect!  (Don’t be afraid to ask!)

SWEET STUFF
– Handmade Cards/Projects from Kids: Above all, moms cherish those little creations made by tiny hands!  Engage the kids in a project for mom (preferably while they are out of the house so mom can read, sleep, pamper, putter, or binge watch her favorite show in silence!)
– Loving Note from Husband/Significant Other: Several moms mentioned that they love to hear from their husbands/partners on Mother’s Day.  Just a few words of acknowledgment and appreciation go a long way (but not always all the way…so no strings attached guys, okay?).
– A Simple Thank You: Two words that mean more than anything money can buy!

EXTRAS:  It’s hard to make a list of things NOT to do — but over and over again, moms expressed the desire for a day that included:
– No Chores (ideally done for her, not left for Monday morning!)
– No Decisions (mom might like someone else to take the reins today)
– No Requests (a day without question marks would be delightful)
– No Fighting (for one day, please!  You can do this!)

Your Happyness Challenge for the week ahead: Mother’s Day is May 9th!  Do you know what the mom in your life REALLY wants?  Use this list to jump start the conversation!  Present her with a home-made menu of options and have her circle her favorites.  You might even be able to multi-task to make sure she gets a little of everything she wants throughout the day.  The most important thing, especially this year, is to PLAN AHEAD!  Please don’t leave it to the last minute.  You have more than a week!!!

And if it is a restaurant meal — please make your reservations/place your order now (and be sure to take care of the staff that takes care of you… chances are it’s their Mother’s Day too.)

Above all: Remember that Mother’s Day is available every day — not just once a year!

[A big THANK YOU once again to all the Dreamers & Builders who took the time to respond to my original poll — and whose honest sharing made this post possible!]

Spread Happyness — PLAN AHEAD!  And share your Mother’s Day ideas for THIS YEAR in the comments!

PS: I realize that for some, Mother’s Day is not always the happiest of holidays — and this year may have complicated things further.  Death, disagreements, disconnection, or decline can bring about mixed emotions.  If this is you, you are not alone.  Many women reported similar feelings in a normal year, let alone a pandemic.  Their advice?  Seek refuge in the comfort of safe friends, the company of like-minded people (while physical distancing, of course!), or in the things that you really want for yourself!

[This post originally appeared on Week #85.]

4/30/21 by Grace Church
© Grace Church
grace@spreadhappyness.com